Aug. 25, 2015

Tsk, Tsk . . . For Shame!

Tuesday, August 25, 2015
2:12 A.M. CST

Question For The Individual Behind The Twitter Account Usernamed @DarlingImACat: Oh, So You're A Cat Now, Huh?


While In The Process Of Throwing A 'Block Party' On Twitter - Not Only For Yourself, But For All Of Your Associates As Well - I Happened Upon An Account Which I Believe Exists Under Your Management, Usernamed, @DarlingImACat. And Seeing Your Name In The Name Field, Well, I'd Known Almost Instantly That You Were The User, And That The Account Is A Brand-Spankin'-New One - Recently Created.

I Don't Know How Many Times I Have To Tell You, Dear Madame, That You Will NEVER Be Me. You're Completely Obsessed. And You're Also A Stalker. Did You Create That New Account Just So You Could Continue To Stalk Me And My Profile From It? Well, Of Course You Did.

There's Only One Me, Madame. And No Matter What You Do, You Will Never Be Me. What You Should Do Is Just Be YOU. Be You And Be At Peace. Love Yourself. I've Told You This Before, Dear Madame, But Evidently You Refuse To Accept Sound Wisdom.

(Laughin' At The Ridiculousness Of Your Actions)

In A Form Of Life Imitating Art, I'd Say That You're Proving Your Famous Lyrics: 'But I Just Keep On Comin' Back Incessantly . . .'

You Simply Cannot Leave Me Alone, Can You, Madame? Can You?

(Laughin' . . .In Spite Of Myself)

I Just Got My Pictures Back From My Photographer For The Press. And I'm Gonna Set One Aside For You - Autographed, Of Course, As I Am Now Fully Convinced That I Have A Fan In You.

(Bussin' Up In Laughter)

What I Speak Is Not Self-Flattery, No, But Only Facts. See, Self-Flattery Is A Waste Of Time. Vanity. It Benefits One Nothing. But The Facts? Now They Will Always Stand. Facts Contain No Emptiness. There Is No Gloating In The Stating Of Facts. And What I Bring, Concerning You My Dear Madame, Are The Facts.

You 'Wannabe' Me So Bad That You Done Gon' And Created Yourself Another Twitter Account Which Includes My Name In It's Username Field . . .
You're Humiliating Yourself, Madame.
You're Not Hurting Me. You're Just Hurting Yourself. I'm Still Me.
I've Never Taken Your Name Upon Myself, But You Take Mine Upon You.

(Fatigued Laughter)

I'm Done. I'm Just Done . . .I Don't Know What Else To Say.

(Still Laughin')

You've Protected The Account, But I Still Intend To Welcome It To My 'Block Party,' Madame. And If You Make Haste To Either Change That Username Or Deactivate The Account, Then Such Actions Will Only Prove That You Are/Were Indeed Behind It.

Madame? In Reality, I Would Have To Get A Restraining Order Against You, Wouldn't I?

(Laughter - More Fatigued)

The Peoples Should Know That You're My #1 Fan . . . Dahhhhhling.

I Got Nine Lives . . . Cat's Eyes,
iFelinity ;)

Wannabe Banner Courtesy Of Type Factory.
Used By Permission

FYI: If I'm Off-Base About This, I Will Be The First To Admit It. And Not Only That, But I'd Beg Your Pardon While Standing Corrected, Madame.
However, My 'Gut' Is Repeatedly Telling Me That I Am Not Off-Base About This. And I Find It Imperative To Heed My 'Gut,' As It Has Yet To Steer Me Wrong.

*** Update On Saturday, September 5, 2015: ***

Please Be Informed, My Dearest Men And Women, That The Said Twitter Page's Username Is NOT In Reference To Ms. Ariana Grande's 'Alter Ego,' - Though There Are Obviously Some Who Prefer To Believe That It Is.

I Should Perhaps State, Without Any Untruth, That I Am The ONLY Cat In Whom The Woman Named Mariah Carey Has Any Interest.
...Know This For A Certainty.

'Puss'n Boots'